a new bunch of 'truisms'
When a kid says "Daddy, I want mommy" that's the kid version of "I'd like to speak to your supervisor".
If Adam and Eve had been really smart, they'd have eaten the snake instead of the apple and saved us all a lot of trouble.
We celebrated our anniversary last night with a couple of adult beverages ..Metamucil and Ensure.
Weight loss goal: To be able to clip my toenails and breathe at the same time.
After watching how some people wore their covid masks, I understand why contraception devices fail.
Some of my friends exercise every day. Meanwhile I'm watching a show I don't like because the remote fell on the floor.
For those of you that don't want Alexa or Siri listening in on your conversation, they're making a male version ...it doesn't listen to anything.
Now that Covid has everyone washing their hands correctly ...next week: Turn Signals.
Someone said, "Nothing rhymes with orange." I said, "No, it doesn't."
The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The realist adjusts his sails.
There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Only a fraction of people will find this funny.
Reading gives us someplace to go when we have to stay where we are.
I have many hidden talents. I just wish I could remember where I hid them.
My idea of a Super Bowl is a toilet that cleans itself.
Exercise helps you with decision-making. It's true. I went for a run this morning and decided I'm never going again.
When a kid says "Daddy, I want mommy" that's the kid version of "I'd like to speak to your supervisor".
If Adam and Eve had been really smart, they'd have eaten the snake instead of the apple and saved us all a lot of trouble.
We celebrated our anniversary last night with a couple of adult beverages ..Metamucil and Ensure.
Weight loss goal: To be able to clip my toenails and breathe at the same time.
After watching how some people wore their covid masks, I understand why contraception devices fail.
Some of my friends exercise every day. Meanwhile I'm watching a show I don't like because the remote fell on the floor.
For those of you that don't want Alexa or Siri listening in on your conversation, they're making a male version ...it doesn't listen to anything.
Now that Covid has everyone washing their hands correctly ...next week: Turn Signals.
Someone said, "Nothing rhymes with orange." I said, "No, it doesn't."
The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The realist adjusts his sails.
There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Only a fraction of people will find this funny.
Reading gives us someplace to go when we have to stay where we are.
I have many hidden talents. I just wish I could remember where I hid them.
My idea of a Super Bowl is a toilet that cleans itself.
Exercise helps you with decision-making. It's true. I went for a run this morning and decided I'm never going again.