Big Blue Huddle

 A husband and wife, out enjoying a round of golf, were about to tee off on the third hole, which was lined with beautiful homes. The wife hit her shot and the ball began to slice - her shot was headed directly at a very large plate glass window. Much to her surprise, the ball smashed through the window and shattered it into a million pieces.
They felt compelled to see what damage was done and drove off to see what happened. When they peeked inside the house, they found no one there. The husband called out and no one answered. Upon further investigation, they saw a small gentleman sitting on the couch with a turban on his head.

The wife asked the man, "Do you live here?"

"No, someone just hit a ball through the window, knocked over the vase you see there, freeing me from that little bottle. I am so grateful!" he answered.

The husband asked, "Are you a genie?"

"Oh, why, yes I am. In fact, I am so grateful I will grant you two wishes, and the third I will keep for myself," the man replied.

The husband and wife agreed on two wishes - one was for a scratch handicap for the husband, to which the wife readily agreed. The other was for an income of $1,000,000 per year forever.

The genie nodded his head and said, "Done!"

The genie now said, "For my wish, I would like to have my way with your wife. I have not been with a woman for many years, and after all, I made you a scratch golfer and a millionaire."

The husband and wife agreed.

After the genie and wife were finished, the genie asked the wife, "How long have you been married?"

To which she responded, "Three years."

The genie then asked, "How old is your husband?"

To which she replied, "31 years old."

The genie then asked, "And how long has he believed in this genie crap?"

HER DIARY:

Tonight:  I thought my husband was acting weird.  We had made plans to
meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day
long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but
he made no comment on it.  Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested
that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk.  He agreed, but he didn't
say much. I asked him what was wrong; he said, "Nothing."  I asked him
if it was my fault that he was upset.  He said he wasn't upset, that it had
nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.  On the way home, I
told him that I loved him.  He smiled slightly, and kept driving.  I
can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he didn't say, "I love you,
too."  When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if
he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and
watched TV.  He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with
silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later,
he came to bed.  To my surprise, he responded to my caress, and we made
love.  But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were
somewhere else.  He fell asleep - I cried.  I don't know what to do.  I'm
almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. 

My life is a disaster.


HIS DIARY:

Missed a big deer today, but at least I got laid.

 
Maybe It will make you smile or even better laugh.


A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"
The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!
Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later
a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
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You got Male!

MG,
your math is just fine I was born in 1904 moved from Ridgewood at 18 in 1922, I am 103 yrs old.   With a 3yr old too,  not bad for an old timer


Just kidding, made the change to add clarity

1)  What part of the Country do you live in?
Columbia County, Wisconsin   
Born in Ridgewood, NJ lived throughout Jersey and then in Bucks County, PA until my early 20's

2)  How long have you been a Giants fan?
Family has had tickets since 78, I do not remember it any other way

3)  What do you do for a living?
     Soil Scientist by training, in the past and maybe in the future
     Although I am currently working as a watershed planner and lake planner due to the  family friendly hours (very little evenings and weekends)

4) Anything else you would like to mention about yourself?
    Husband and father (7yrs and 3yrs respectfully)
    36yrs old
    Enjoy community service (work at homeless shelter, Big Brother, volunteer as a             consultant/adviser to local government, serve on other 501C3 Boards)
In my free time I love to hunt and fish