Big Blue Huddle

I'm sure given the current situation there's a lot of these floating around. Anyway...

Day 1

Near the tomb of King Tut-an-khamen, archeologists found the tomb of his ex-wife, Nothin'-in-khamen.

I tried to donate blood today. Never again. There were too many stupid questions. "Who's blood is it?", "Where did you get it?", "Why is it in a bucket?"

I was walking past a farm when I saw a sign that read, "Duck, eggs." I thought that was an unnecessary comma. Then it hit me.

"Do you have that new self-help book about small penises?" the man asked the librarian.
"I don't think it's in yet," the librarian answered.
"Yes," the man said. "That's the one."

I watched a documentary on marijuana last night. From now on, that's how I'm watching all documentaries.

I'm selling off all my old chiropractor magazines. I've got lots of back issues.

The inventor of velcro died. RIP.

My doctor prescribed anti-gloating cream. I can't wait to rub it in.

Someone has been stealing the wheels off police cars. The cops are working tirelessly to catch him.

My therapist told me, "Time heals all wounds."
So I stabbed him.
Now, we wait.

My neighbor knocked on my door at 3 o'clock in the morning. Can you believe that? Good thing I was still up, playing my drums.

"No, thanks. I'm a vegetarian," is a fun thing to say whenever someone tries to hand you their baby.

Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mother only carries a photo of one of them because if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.

I make apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.

Welcome.

Quote from: MightyGiants on May 07, 2019, 05:52:14 PM
I started listening, I haven't finished


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Same here. I'm about halfway through.

Welcome Lou.

What do you call a teacher that never passes gas in public?
A private tutor.

Dogs can

Sad news. May he RIP.

You

Quote from: Scared Homie on September 25, 2018, 10:33:51 PM
1)  What part of the Country do you live in? Small town in upstate NY - Vestal

2)  How long have you been a Giants fan? Since 1980

3)  What do you do for a living? Work in IT for a Life Insurance Co.

4) Anything else you would like to mention about yourself? Married w/ 3 knuckleheads.

Welcome Homie. I'm originally from Endicott, but living on the west coast now.

Quote from: drakew on January 07, 2018, 10:01:55 PM
AND.... I can still quote "Invictus" by William Earnest Henley absolutely perfectly....thanx to my English teacher at JFS.

Mr. Hines?  I never had him, but a friend of mine did. I remember Mr. Miller (math teacher) used to be in on it too because he used to corner kids with the Invictus demand. Later in life I became friends with Mr. (Mike) Miller whose daughters and our daughter became good friends. He lost one of his girls in a tragic car accident.

A blonde was sitting in the bar watching the late news. There was one other patron . On the news was a story of a man who was standing on the ledge of a 4 story building threatening to jump. The guy also watching says "I bet $50 you he'll jump", and the blonde says "ok I bet $50 you he won't ".

The man jumped, so the blonde pulls out her purse and says "here's your $50", and the guy said "no I can't accept it. I watched the early news and heard that he jumped".
Then the blonde replied "So did I but I didn't think he'd do it again!"

Q: What cost 45 cents?

A: A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickleback

Drake, I went to JFS, Kindergarten through 9th.
Caught a bad case of poison ivy on Roundtop.
Probably ate my weight in Pat Mitchell's ice cream over the years. The best I've ever eaten, easily better than Ben and Jerry's.
Used to tube down the "Susquey" with my fishing pole and a six-pack.
Accidentally burned down 25 acres of the woods above West Corners in 1970.

Thanks for the memories.