Big Blue Huddle

What is the motto of a Jewish cannibal?

Keep your friends close, and your enemies Kosher...

sent from a friend down south:

Yesterday, I passed a newly-opened car detailing business.

They call themselves "So-So Clean".

Who wants a car cleaning that is only "so-so"???

They should have called their business "So, So, Clean".





There once was a used car lot not far from me.

They required a minimum down payment of $500, but would accept higher sums.

Their sign read "$500 down and up".





Currently, there is a used car dealer here called "Sports & Imports".

They have no sportscars, although they did have a Corvette briefly.

Mostly, they sell Jeeps, Hummers, and domestic SUVs.





Thre are some brothers named May (like James May of Top Gear) here in Chattanooga.

They own & operate several automotive-related businesses in the area.

One of the businesses sells used/worn tires.

It is called "May Pop Tires".

I like that one!

How do you make a handkerchief dance?

--Blow a little boogie into it...

Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
A: No-eye-deer

On vacation, I just woke her up laughing out loud, guffaws ya know!

When they took my picture, the camera broke, and it has been out-of-focus forever since.....

What do you call a fish with no eyes?





















FSH..........

Now THAT'S FUNNY! 

 Jewish woman gave birth to a baby boy.  It was a difficult birth and she was given something to help her sleep.  While she was out, the doctor came in and spoke with the father.  "Sir, your little boy is healthy and normal except for one thing.  He was born with no eyelids.  Not to worry, though, we can do a skin graft from another part of his body and nobody will ever know the difference.  He has to be circumcised anyway, so we are going to use some of the foreskin."  The father agreed and the minor surgery went fine, but he decided not to tell his wife all the details.  Back home a few days later, the bandages were removed and the father said,  "See.  I told you the doctor said it would be fine.  I think he did a great job, don't you, honey?".   The mother examined the boy, turning his head one way and then the other, and said, "I don't know.  Looks a little cockeyed to me."

   
HOUSTON - A vehicle involved in a traffic accident careened into a Houston-area Cadillac dealership and struck a row of Escalades, triggering a fire that destroyed six of the pricey SUVs.
   
The general manager of the dealership, Steven Hainline (hay-LINE'), says the loss of the SUVs amounts to about $700,000.
   
He says the episode began early Tuesday morning when two vehicles collided on the Interstate 45 frontage road just north of Houston. A Toyota Scion left the road, traveled through fencing and became wedged among three Escalades. The Scion then caught fire and the flames spread to the SUVs.
   
Authorities say the two motorists involved in the initial wreck suffered injuries not considered life-threatening.
   
Hainline says the fire made "for a really long day."

EDIT TO ADD: i WOULD HAVE PUT THIS IN ODD NEWS. BUT TO HAVE A $15K TOYOTA TAKE OUT $700k OF CADDIES IS TOO FUNNY!

Yogi Berra's New Jersey home up for sale
   
MONTCLAIR, N.J. (AP) - It's not the house that Yogi Berra built. But it is the place in New Jersey that Berra, his wife and three sons called home for almost 40 years.
   
The six-bedroom, 3

TAMPA, Fla.  Ichiro Suzuki watched as the New York Yankees added Jacoby Ellsbury and then Carlos Beltran to an outfield that already included Brett Gardner and the Japanese star plus Alfonso Soriano, a backup who figures to see time at designated hitter.
   
What did he think?
   
Suzuki gave his reply, and his interpreter started to translate.
   
"Obviously I don't get frustrated or angry," the interpreter said. "My reaction was kind - "
   
And then Suzuki leaned forward and interrupted.
   
"Oops," he said in English, smiling.
   
"That's the reaction," the interpreter said.

For St valentine's DAY!!!!!!!!

Pitchers and catchers report

In the midst of a firey sermon, the preacher stopped and asked the congregation "Resurrection! Do you know what the Resurrection is?"

A small boy, 4 or 5 years old, stood up and said "I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I know that if it lasts for more than four hours, you should call a doctor."

NYUK NYUK NYUK NYUK.....