Just a joke

[LennG]

cute one

[LennG]

cute

[LennG]

Found another

[T200]

cute

Porky Pig at a Spelling Bee 

[LennG]

Another Blonde joke

[LennG]

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing You're just like Frank."
Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was really something special."

Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything.
Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow, what a guy!"

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her  back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "I never actually met Frank.
He died and I married his wife."

[Jolly Blue Giant]

That is hilarious Lenn - I about spilled my coffee 

[Jolly Blue Giant]

I have a friend who lives just outside Chernobyl in Ukraine.
He watched that drama and says he counted 9 historical inaccuracies on one hand!

[Sem]

A few quick ones....

Did you ever get to see Mt Rushmore before it was carved? I hear its beauty was unpresidented.

A man's wife decided to become a whiskey maker. He loved her still.

When my kleptomania starts acting up, I take something for it.

The police arrested a mafia hit man for killing someone in a rice field with a porcelain figurine.
It was the first known case of a knickknack paddy whack

I sang into a colander. Shouldn't have done that.
Strained my voice.

The sound from a musician on stage bounces off the auditorium walls to surround the audience.
The sound from a pigeon on stage does not do this. Because?
A coo sticks.

Why did the girl take the toilet paper roll to the party?
She was a PARTY POOPER!

When do they review the table of elements?
Periodically

As I was driving by the prison yesterday I saw a dwarf scaling down the wall. Confused, I stared up at him and he sneered back. And I thought to myself, "well that

[LennG]

Some Pandemic Humor


The spread of Covid-19 is based on two things:
       1. How dense the population is.
       2. How dense the population is.


Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money.

The dumbest thing I've ever bought was a 2020 planner ...

[LennG]

cute, but probably true

[Jolly Blue Giant]

cute, but probably true

[LennG]

We need more humor

[LennG]

Think about this one for a minute

[LennG]

more truisms