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Just a joke

Started by babywhales, November 02, 2007, 11:44:05 AM

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LennG


How about some pre Christmas humor, or not



I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

LennG



Some 'new' humor


 took my suit to the cleaners, who wanted to charge me $40, so I gave it to the charity shop next door. They cleaned and pressed it and put it in the window. I bought it back for $15.


 Someone just gave me half a peace sign. Weird.


 My wife and I started role-playing in the bedroom. Her favorite is The Sexy Librarian where I have to sit quietly while she reads a book.


 At a wedding reception, someone yelled: "All married people please stand next to the one person that has made your life worth living.
 
" The bartender was almost crushed to death.


Yesterday I bought a world map, gave my wife a dart, and said, "Throw this and wherever it lands, I will take you on vacation.
 
" We're spending 3 weeks behind the fridge.
I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

Jolly Blue Giant

QuoteMy wife and I started role-playing in the bedroom. Her favorite is The Sexy Librarian where I have to sit quietly while she reads a book

Classic  =))
The fact that Keith Richards has outlived Richard Simmons, sure makes me question this whole, "healthy eating and exercise" thing

LennG


Been a few weeks or so, but here are a few new ones or, I think they are new)



I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

LennG

I'm a VERY sentimental person (I am) and Charles Schultz got it  right all the time


I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

LennG

I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

LennG


A great one, at least I think so,



I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

Jolly Blue Giant

I don't know if these qualify as "jokes", but here they are anyway

THE REAL STAGES OF LIFE



The fact that Keith Richards has outlived Richard Simmons, sure makes me question this whole, "healthy eating and exercise" thing

Ed Vette

"There is a greater purpose...that purpose is team. Winning, losing, playing hard, playing well, doing it for each other, winning the right way, winning the right way is a very important thing to me... Championships are won by teams who love one another, who respect one another, and play for and support one another."
~ Coach Tom Coughlin

Jolly Blue Giant

The fact that Keith Richards has outlived Richard Simmons, sure makes me question this whole, "healthy eating and exercise" thing

Jolly Blue Giant

When kids ask the million dollar question and unprepared, vs prepared

UNPREPARED
A little boy , ask his mom, Mom "where did I come from???" Mom thought for second,, I guess he's old enough to tell him, she started with Dad and her went to the bedroom, and 9 months later he was born!!! Then she asked, "why did you want to know?" To his reply, "cuz Billy said he was from Pennsylvania"!!

PREPARED
The fact that Keith Richards has outlived Richard Simmons, sure makes me question this whole, "healthy eating and exercise" thing

LennG

I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

LennG

I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss

Ed Vette

A Jewish man decides his son isn't Jewish enough, so he pays for him to visit Israel.

When the son comes back however, he announces that he's now a Christian. The father goes to a friend and tells him the story. His friend says, "Thats funny, last year I sent my son to Israel and he too came back Christian.

The two men decide they need to speak to their Rabbi about it, but when they explain the situation, the Rabbi says, "That's funny, two years ago I sent my son to Israel and he also came back a Christian.

The three men decide that only God can have the answer, so they pray. The Rabbi says aloud, "Dear God, the three of us sent our sons to Israel, and all three came back Christian."

God's voice booms down, "That's funny..."
"There is a greater purpose...that purpose is team. Winning, losing, playing hard, playing well, doing it for each other, winning the right way, winning the right way is a very important thing to me... Championships are won by teams who love one another, who respect one another, and play for and support one another."
~ Coach Tom Coughlin

LennG

weekend funnies


I HATE TO INCLUDE THE WORD NASTY< BUT THAT IS PART OF BEING A WINNING FOOTBALL TEAM.

Charlie Weiss