Big Blue Huddle

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

3. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

4. A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

5.  Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't
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8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone from Florida would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.

12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

14. God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark.

15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people, who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Quote from: LennG on November 12, 2024, 06:12:37 PM12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

I like that one. It kind of reminds me of another one...

Show a man how to light a fire and he will be warm for a day.
Light a man on fire and he will be warm the rest of is life.

Quote6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't

One of my favorite scenes

some weekend funnies (I hope)

memories

Our house was broken into and they took my limbo stick. How low can they go?

Well, I guess I'm never going caroling at the psych hospital ever again.

In hindsight, I suppose it was a poor choice to sing "Do You Hear What I Hear?"

Four people were bragging about how smart their cats are.

The first was an Engineer, the second an Accountant, the third was a chemist, the fourth was a Government Worker. To show off, The Engineer called to his cat, "T-square, do your stuff."

 T-Square pranced over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.

Everyone agreed that was a pretty smart cat, but the Accountant said his cat could do better.

He called his cat and said, "Spreadsheet, do your stuff." Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies each.

Everyone agreed that was really good, but the Chemist said his cat could do better.
He called his cat and said, "Measure, do your stuff."

Measure got up picked up a 500ml graduated cylinder, walked over to the fridge, took out a liter of milk, got a 300 ml glass from the cupboard, measured and poured exactly 275 ml of milk into the glass without spilling a drop.

Everyone agreed that was good too. Then the three men turned to the Government Worker and said, "What can your cat do?"

The Government worker called to his cat and said, "Coffee Break, do your stuff." Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, pooped on the paper, screwed the other three cats, claimed he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for Workers comp, and went home on sick leave.

I am one of those people who don't recognize this...please enlighten me. You guys are making me feel young...lol

Quote from: Jolly Blue Giant on November 25, 2024, 07:35:34 PM

I am one of those people who don't recognize this...please enlighten me. You guys are making me feel young...lol

OK YOUNGSTER, back in the day, especially from people who sold things on their own, this 'thing' dispensed coins from 4 different denominations, like pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters to make change. If you wanted a Good Humor ice cream and it was 45 cents, you gave the guy a dollar and he clicked this little gadget and got you change. Again, this was more for people who sold things, not in stores, usually clipped to your belt.

You can still buy them

https://www.amazon.com/McGill-Nickel-Plated-Changer-Quarter-Barrels/dp/B0006HX1GC/ref=sr_1_3?adgrpid=1335907193980053&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.PZFky99CZDQRIIsP-iteSPR4np3yR2r49ZUIcRDNh_0JFc7N42qV-PThqD2lJBopq-AOfFdPIWOgR5gpspFusuYHmec2pTux4K5rQvqtR77LDb64-kO0xtBcq6mMUIRMQdJhh1NAxDcFit4Iwiv7bdus5nxEzuYGSwq4ZGq8XGVlNJ0QMS0QApwCGLkclIxwsFask3P-F9yNinUDhg4WDv0ExYNsc6kdzWE0T9m1uXy18onSGjORWOEabyY5tbdO18mIDESPpfAL2KUZh2n5mlhg3Kt5-464OkbhXTLrAjs.Fci4svrxm3otUVmKrn5eOsmLfvC0qG34a97im7w4aYU&dib_tag=se&hvadid=83494438568863&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=97203&hvnetw=o&hvqmt=e&hvtargid=kwd-83494550717058%3Aloc-190&hydadcr=10679_13481959&keywords=coin+belt+dispenser&qid=1732582063&sr=8-3

Oh yeah...I remember them on the waist of waitresses at the old diner. I thought it was part of a musical instrument....duhh

My dad owned a coffee/snack truck and used one of those coin changers every day. I think I may still have some spare parts in my garage.

Didn't the folks at the drive-in restaurants use those? I'm thinking the A&W drive-ins in particular. You could hear them coming long before you saw them.   

I may have posted this quick clip before, and if so apologies. But this still cracks me up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kb0kiiB3O-o

i was a paper boy and had one of those change dispensers. thought i was a big shot. lol